Thursday, December 11, 2008

THANKFUL THURSDAY

I can't tell you how blessed I am this Thankful Thursday. My foster daughter, Diana, has written a Thankful Thursday that I would like to share with you. Her youngest daughter, Hailey, has been diagnosed with Angelman's Syndrome. This is a post, written by Diana, written for the Angelman Foundation....and us. Keeping with Iris' reminder to "Praise Him in your circumstances, even if you don’t feel like praising Him for your circumstances…," this post illuminates thankfulness in extraordinarily difficult circumstance.

Today I am thankful for "ANGELS:"  My Mom, My counselor and anti-depressants.

On May 25,2005 Hailey was born; she was this little tiny
5.5lb baby girl with thick brown hair. Perfect. However as
months passed we noticed something was just not right; milestones
were delayed. We fought, we searched--and after nearly four years,
we finally received a diagnosis in July. Hailey has Angelman Syndrome.

I have struggled with this for the last 5 years. About six months
ago, I was locking my self in my room and crying when ever I could. I
didn't do anything except tend to Hailey and hate myself and my
situation. I had been living like this since I realized something
waswrong with her. Six months ago, with encouragement from my Mom
I hit my breaking point, or rather my rebirth! I made an
appointment with a counselor. Best thing I ever did. She had me go to the DR. and
get on anti-depressants. She helped me realize I had been grieving the
loss of the child I had brought home on that chilly morning in May.
The beautiful little girl that was going to be the prom queen and a
soccer star.

I refer to it as a glass ball. When we have children(or
adopt them or foster them)we have this glass ball full of hopes and
dreams. Hailey's ball dropped and shattered into a thousand pieces.
Our family is still picking up the pieces and gluing them back
together the best we know how. It is no longer a perfect glass ball,
and for a little while we didn't know what it would look like in the
end, but now after counseling, and the great support of a great
family, I am seeing the shape much more clearly than I had in the
past. It is taking the shape of a perfect "ANGEL".

Most parents never feel the joy that our Angel children bring, without saying a
word they tell us 100 times a day that they love us. They do not
judge, they never say hurtful words and they never lie. They
laugh, smile, kiss and hug!! If that is not a perfect child I don't
know what one is!!

Thank you to my Mom for your support, to my counselor for lifting the
cloud, and too My angel Hailey, for you unconditional love, you are
truly a blessing in disguise!

Please leave a comment of encouragement for Diana. I am thankful for your blessings extended.

7 comments:

Denise said...

God bless your precious heart, may you be sweetly blessed.

Pam said...

I totally relate to your heart and story Diana... we are still in the searching for answers stage with my daughter, but how you describe the dissappointment is exactly what I can relate to. Thanks for sharing this today.

Laurie Ann said...

Oh, please know I am praying for you - may God's blessings rain down around you and may you feel His comforting arms wrap around you.

Diana Kostreba said...

Thank you all for your support! You are all great!

Jill said...

Diana - I'm so very sorry for how you must have felt so alone and had no one who was listening and hearing the plea for your daughter. I am sorry for the time that was wasted in many ways trying to find out what was really going on with Hailey and yet - GOD!

He was at work in your heart and life preparing you to be strong for the revelation of her disorder. He was working in you to get you to where you are today - instead of seeing the ball shattered it is whole and perfect just the way He made Hailey for you family. Your hopes may have been shattered for her BUT His never were!

Know that I'm praying for you as you continue to care for her and see life through His eyes as she loves you without question!

God bless you and your family this day!

Hugs,
Jill

Marsha said...

I'm sitting here in tears. What a beautiful post by your foster daughter. I thank God for the influence you have been in her life. Hailey received a special gift from heaven and she is sharing it with open arms with all who have met her through this post.

God bless you all.

Dawn said...

The loss of dreams for our children is definitely heartbreaking, and we mourn. I am so thankful you have found help and were able to write this beautiful post from the heart. I am going to look up this disorder so I can understand better what you are going through.